Dose #2 - The One Where Your Hair Falls Out

Dose #2 was on Monday the 10th (Easter Monday -yippee!)

Let me just begin this post with a big thank you for (1) coming here to read my musings. I'm not under any illusion that my "health journey" is a riveting account of adventure. And (2) for all that are checking in via text and messages during this treatment. It makes me feel like I'm still a part of this world as I lay on the couch or stare at the pages of a book... when I'd rather be keeping busy. 

Everyone who has been through chemo has said that we'll fall into a rhythm of sorts. You'll begin to know which day has the worst side effects and how to manage them. The anti-nausea meds are prescribed for days 2-4 and day 5 has been pretty intimidating to me. Why don't I get days 5,6,7,8 and so on? I have plenty to take AS NEEDED and I've felt like they've been needed. The good news is they work. 

I went to my Tuesday acupuncture appointment and am taking a CBD oil to ward off nausea and neuropathy. I added a medical grade drink called Enterade to my regime and I think it's helped a lot with stomach cramping. Other than that, we are just eating the amazingly good food our meal train has provided. We know a lot of amazing cooks and generous friends. There's no lacking in carbohydrates here. 

The big news is that my hair fell out basically overnight. 

I don't know why the big "shed" occurs around day 14-20 after chemotherapy begins, but it happened right on schedule. 

I've been following the comments in several breast cancer Facebook groups - some specifically for cold capping, which is a huge reason why I chose NOT to invest $1800 in a contraption that only had a 50% chance of working. I read a lot of comments from women that were heartbroken that their hair was still coming out in huge clumps and the MAINTENANCE. Ugghhh. You can only wash your remaining hair 1-2 times per week, brush it extremely gently, avoid swimming, avoid blow drying, avoid hair products, etc etc. Pretty much avoid all joy and ease to your life. (At least that's my take on it). The science behind it is extremely interesting, just not what I'm looking for on top of dealing with the other physical discomfort of chemotherapy. I know I didn't want to devote another 2 hours in the hospital each infusion, freezing my scalp and then being so intimidated by what's left in my scalp to sleep soundly. 

Hence, my decision to accept that my hair IS going to fall out. I didn't want to prolong the heartache. By Thursday of this week, it was getting pretty patchy. If I kept it in a ponytail, I could manage but by Friday morning - it was time! Gregory, and our Covid-era hair clippers, had the hard job of giving me a buzz cut. I was afraid that I'd hate my reflection, but so far - I'm less traumatized than I expected. 

Finian refused to look at me initially and today he still didn't exactly have encouraging words... but living with him, one needs a thick skin anyways. Poor Delphine cried at first, even though we've read several books about this. But by the time we were ready to go to the movies (because there's no hiding in the house for me!), she was ready to see me try out one of the several wigs I've purchased. 

I could go in-depth with my family history of baldness (it happens early to the Stantons) , how I got my new haircut on the anniversary of my father's passing (and his bald head). I could make jokes and talk about how it's going to be fun to try new scarves and silk-lined hats. When in reality, it's just going to continue to be weird. Weird, but ok. I have support, I have the resources to try ways to venture out in public. This is all just a surreal experience. 

I'll end this post with some photos of the extremely thoughtful items friends sent or dropped off this week. I'm honestly excited about the prospect of all the thank you notes I get to write!