More than cravings

I have to admit, the third time around - I'm not a big fan of the first months of pregnancy. I am tired; I feel nauseous when I'm hungry and after I eat. My hair looks gross, I feel gross, I don't fit into my clothes. It's like PMS on steroids. And if you are superstitious like us and don't spread the news until the 12 week mark - then everyone in your life thinks you are just a big, hot mess because they don't really know what's going on.

With Ayla, I spent the first 3-4 months just mystified that I was really pregnant. Other than feeling sick, there isn't much proof that a tiny baby is forming inside of you. It seemed that the first trimester went on forever because I was waiting to actually see the "baby bump". With Jackson, I was slightly better at managing the nausea and knew better - I would soon see a growing stomach to go with that ever-nagging feeling.

And here we are, baby #3 and the first trimester seems like unnecessary torture. Can't we just skip forward to six months? I don't mind - I have the maternity clothes. People don't have to wonder whether I'm just gaining weight and I can start nesting. That damn nesting instinct really helps with getting odd jobs done around the house, I am so hormonally motivated!

Don't get me wrong - I'm not complaining about being pregnant. Women who aren't pregnant yet or are desperately trying tend get offended when other women complain. If I had waited ten years for this, I'd be a little bit more "appreciative" of my pregnant status. I know it's not easy on Gregory either when I am totally useless first thing in the morning. This is just where I am RIGHT NOW.

But here's the secret: food is both friend and foe. The cycle goes, you don't want to eat because you feel like throwing up. But if you don't eat, the nausea gets worse. Eat often, but only select items and feel about 30 minutes of relief. I've gone almost completely vegetarian in the last couple of weeks because anything but carbs, fruits and veggies smell really disgusting. That is - until I get the weirdest craving for a hamburger.

Top food items of the week: pickles (alone, not in ice cream), soda water, jasmine rice, veggie burritos, pasta, crackers with peanut butter, apples, bananas, cereal with soy milk and grilled cheese sandwiches.

Terrible food items of the week: chicken, pork, turkey, tuna, Diet Coke, candy, lettuce and yogurt.

More than cravings, this is survival!

Hope is around the corner - these symptoms (which aren't even severe by morning sickness standards) usually disappear around 4 months... almost there. I'm not looking for sympathy, this goes with the territory. But I can say it gets tiresome. It's amazing that pregnancy causes such bizarre reactions in the body. Now it's time for more cereal...